I appreciate The Onion's irreverent humor and read its fictional headlines every day looking for something to make me laugh. I giggle at about 20% of stories, but I put the story about missing hikers in the
disgusting (or too close to home) category.
Setting aside my revulsion for this morbid story, in my own family, whenever we face tragedy, we do the same as The Onion newscasters did in this story: we break the tension by pretending that our situation will be made into a movie, and we cast the movie. Most often my part is played by Tom Hanks. In The Onion's fictional story, the newscasters used words such as young, attractive, handsome, and fit to describe the lost hikers as they cast a possible made-for-TV movie. The newscasters hoped also for action scenes with wild animals and romantic subplots (although the mentioned "kissing under a waterfall" scene did not fit with the snowy mountain SAR image in the video, unless it were to be a flashback). Overall, IMHO, this story was in bad taste, and if I were king, I would have spiked it.