The Hills Have Eyes--And Also Fish Eggs ....

[cynthia23]

Yes, folks, it's unbelievable, but true. Like some whiny country and western song you just can't get out of your head, the ballad of Crazydude twangs interminably on! (If you don't know what I'm talking about, read my previous post, "What to do about Crazydude's stuff?")

On Saturday April 7th Grandmaster P. and Cynthia23 tagged along with the Palm Springs Police Mounted Search and Rescue as they did a foot search for the (possibly) lost and injured hiker mentioned in my previous post. We met the original witness, Mr. Snyder, a hiker who was off-trail and above Dry Falls when he heard cries for help. In the opinion of the police, Grandmaster and me, Mr. Snyder was a reliable witness, experienced hiker, and straight-up fella, who did not seem as if he would be prone to the vapors or imagining lost people where there were none …

We all hiked up to 2500 feet and the camp of Crazydude. The CHP helicopter and plane followed above. The CHP copter pilot mentioned to Sgt. Anderson that somebody—presumably, C.D.—has been flashing him with obscene nude displays from a rock at around 2500 feet. At Camp Crazydude, I found that his belongings appeared to be disturbed and were not neatly rolled as Magikwalt reported on Wednesday. The plastic bottles were gone—sounds like Cy took them (thank you!) I found a cigarette butt in his sleeping bag (C-dude has been smoking in bed, I guess.)

While we were all standing around there, we happened to spot a glint down in Dry Canyon, off-trail and several hundred feet below. The CHP helicopter flew in for a closer look and spotted a backpack below.

Sgt. Bryan Anderson of the P.S. police, another P.S. search and rescue gentleman, Frank, Grandmaster, and Cynthia23, went off-trail and down into Dry Canyon. After a few minutes of strenuous scrambling down into the canyon, two things quickly happened: Grandmaster reported that the descending route ahead was gnarly and technical, and Cynthia23's pants enjoyed a massive rear split of truly seismic proportions. Alas, I was wearing no underwear. All my sedimentary layers were completely exposed to the light of day. We're talking my own obscene nude display.

Since I was already getting into trouble with just some minor scrambling and holding everyone up with my dizzy tottering, I took this as a sign from the Gods and headed back to the trail (backwards) and the fervent mockery of the other search and rescue people. I was able to utilize a spare t-shirt as improv underwear, and decency was preserved, albeit barely. (My role for the day seems to have been to provide the troops with comic relief, and I believe I succeeded admirably.)

Meanwhile, Sgt. Anderson, Frank, and Grandmaster continued down-climbing into the canyon. There, they found many interesting things: a backpack containing such items as a diary, sermon notes from Calvary Chapel dated October, a magazine, and—we kid you not—a fishing rod and salmon eggs (!!!!) The eggs were still moist. Further down, they found a space blanket and machete. The one thing they did not find was Crazydude, or any other person.

They bushwhacked their way all the way back down the canyon to the mouth of Dry Falls, with much scrambling, some dangerous free-hand rock-climbing, and a vast amount of hacking through cats claw. The rest of us, meanwhile, proceeded down in a stately manner via the trail. We picked up the threesome at the mouth of Dry Canyon. Poor Grandmaster, who was not wearing heavy clothes, looked like he had been in a cat fight, and was covered with scratches from head to toe. Even worse, he had to go directly to his job.

The results of this day are inconclusive. My uneasy personal opinion is that Mr. Snyder heard an actual injured person and not just prank-playing teenagers. Since no one is reported missing and there are no cars at any of the trail-heads, the only possibility is that this person is a homeless type person. And C-dude does seem the likely candidate. The gear that was found today, as well as the CHP copter pilot reporting regular sitings of a nude flasher at 2500 (other than me, that is) suggests, at least, that he has been up there recently.

It's all very weird and troubling. My brief experience of scrambling into the canyon quickly impressed on me that it would be incredibly easy for someone to take a very serious fall in this terrain. The rocks are unstable, "chaussy", and slippery, and the hill is pockmarked like swiss cheese with rabbit and snake holes. Speaking as someone who has actually fallen a couple of times on just the trail on Skyline, luckily never with serious injury, I know in my gut just how scary it would be to be way off-trail and seriously injured. I cannot imagine a more terrifying scenario. I feel for this person, whoever he is.

On the other hand, Grandmaster pointed out that if C.D. is tweaking or mentally ill, it's possible he was not truly seriously injured, but just screaming in some kind of drug high or psychotic state. Or, it could have even been C-dude's way of maliciously pranking an interloper on "his" terrain. Let's hope this is the case.

Because if not, if he truly is injured, then this person, whoever he is, will soon be dead, or already is.

The police have, very understandably, ended the search. They cannot reasonably be expected to do any more, as they have already put a huge amount of time and money into this search when it's by no means clear there truly is an injured person up there. But I can't help but feeling disturbed about this …so please, if anyone has any information whatsoever, please post something ASAP, or, of course, directly contact Sgt. Anderson at the Palm Springs Police. If there is some piece of this puzzle we haven't seen, or a brainstorm, post your thoughts, please!

Now, a second, cautionary note: if C-dude is not seriously injured, but is still living up there, this is ALSO disturbing. Not to go all Wes Craven on y'all, but consider this: there may be a guy living up there in the rocks, off-trail and out of view, who is a few cherries short of a sundae. We don't need to violate C-dude's human dignity or privacy by getting specific, but his diary actually mentioned drug use and struggles with dark impulses. These are things to be concerned about. I am not being sarcastic or mocking when I say that a man who carries a fishing rod up Skyline is not fully rational. Keep your distance if you run into someone you think might be him.

Ignore my previous post asking people to take an item here or there from his camp, one at a time. DON'T DO THAT. No one on their own should attempt to remove his stuff, because he could well be watching and in the vicinity. He might be really paranoid and upset now, especially because planes etc. have been looking for him. Solitary hikers, especially females, should be aware that this area may well contain a questionable person. Let me amend that: a questionable person with a MACHETE. And God only knows what he could do with those salmon eggs …

Seriously: There was an attack on hikers some years ago at 1100 feet by a mentally disturbed guy who was living up there. Something similar could be happening here.

I dunno now what we should do to get rid of his stuff. Of course, now more than ever, I think we should. If C-dude is alive, it's only a matter of when, not if, he starts a fire. Clearly, we need to get a group to safely remove his stuff. The fire danger here is what is really worrying me.

Ok, nuff for now—but I want to give a big shout out to the Grandmaster P, Sergeant Anderson, and the P.S. Search and Rescue guys. They all literally went the extra mile—in fact six or so--and Grandmaster, Frank, and Sgt. Anderson had a very gnarly time down in that canyon. Sgt. Anderson did not hesitate in the slightest to go down there; in fact we had to restrain him from descending an actual cliff. It was genuinely noble of all of these men to to risk their lives for this unknown guy, so let's be appreciative of these real-life heroes. I hereby declare in my capacity as Nude Class Clown that Sgt. Anderson, Frank, and the rest of the P.S. search and rescue men are now Honorable Skylies. And for his heroic efforts in maintaining these web sites and crawling through six miles of cats claw: Somebody take Grandmaster out to lunch!!! (and buy me a new pair of pants?)

[cynthia23]

P.S. If you have EVER had ANY contact with this guy, or even think you might have, please POST ASAP. It would be immensely helpful if we could actually confirm that the guy has been up there in the past few months. Any bit of info might be helpful.